Tuesday, October 23, 2012


While a storm brews off the shores of our Caribbean isle, our parents are preparing for the full effects of category one Hurricane Sandy (the squirrel). They buy canned goods and batteries, store water, etc etc., to prevent unreservedly primitive living. Truth is, while the radio repeats the precautions to be made in the case of a hurricane every hour on the hour, since time immemorial, like the precautions are ever going to change - our poor teenage souls are left to fend for ourselves in the realm of disaster-living; searching, and often not finding a means of entertainment to live through the disaster. While it is first and foremostly important to remain as safe as possible during a storm - I figure that if any of you are anything at all like me, you'd like to have some closure when it comes to what you can do for yourself before and after a hurricane.

Ok, poetics aside, here's what you should do in the case of a hurricane:


Get it done the day school lets you off early until further notice. I'm sure we've all been in situations where we overestimate pending tropical storms and hurricanes, only to realize they're a total bust and we do have school the next day..... Awkward..... Don't let the homework pile up, otherwise you'll cry the night before with a major cup of coffee in your hand and papers scattered across the floor - not exactly 'très chic'


And when I say long, I mean really long. I mean I normally take half-hour in the mornings without washing my hair. So, roughly approximating, I'd say spend an hour and a half or two, washing your hair, shaving, pampering etc. You never know what type of radioactive, contaminated, debris-ridden water Sandy might leave us with after she's shat all over us. Even with a tank, you might be bathing out of a bucket for the next few days. Take heed my friends, take heed.


We all have 'Rain' playlists on our iTunes, but how may of us have 'Hurricane' playlists? I'm sure none of you do, because I just thought of it and I don't even have one. When it comes to music, it's all about what you like to listen to of course, but no offense, if you don't even consider the songs I'm about to suggest, you might be basic? I'm sorry that that may be the case my friend, but we all have to learn to live with our afflictions. Anyway here are my ideas of a Hurricane playlist:

Ayla - The Maccabees
Barely Love You Too - Frank + Derol
The Boys - Nicki Minaj Feat. Cassie (I already know what you're thinking, shut up)
Little House - Amanda Seyfried
Give Me Love - Ed Sheeran
Lego House - Ed Sheeran (scratch that, everything by Ed Sheeran)
Red - Taylor Swift (The entire album. Or you could just have everything by her like me - why not)
The Cave - Mumford And Sons
Little Lion Man - Mumford And Sons
I Will Wait - Mumford And Sons
Gossamer - Passion Pit
After The Storm - Mumford And Sons
Boom - Anjulie
Fantasea - Azealia Banks (The mixtape)

For movies, I prefer watching a mix of pathetic teenage/young adult films involving suicide, pathetic emotions, drugs, eating disorders or psychosis (or all the above), along with horrors/thrillers of the late 90's into the 2000's. Why not live what we were too young to appreciate, right? Don't forget all - or just a few - of the Audrey Hepburn movies too!

The Silence Of The Lambs
Sixth Sense
The Others
Funny Face
Dazed and Confused
The Breakfast Club
Pretty Woman
Ten Things I Hate About You
Breakfast At TIffany's
Girl, Interrupted
Life Size
Forrest Gump
The Parent Trap
Jurassic Park
Toy Story (shut up)
Lion King (3rd time's the charm)

Books - Read whatever you really want, whether it's pathetic teen love stories, tear jerkers, historical novels, poems, whatever. Just physically and emotionally immerse yourself in something to pass time. While you all read something by Nicholas Sparks (blah), I'll be reading the latest issue of Vogue (and all the others before that because I'm hopeless), The Fault In Our Stars by John Green, Sylvia Plath's entire collection of poems as well as The Bell Jar by her.

Wasn't that fabulous? Ok have fun and keep safe in the hurricane!!!!!


Saturday, October 20, 2012


While watching The Addams Family film, and possibly starving myself in the process, a friend from school told me I'd "make a great Wednesday". I pondered upon it for a while - 3 seconds approximately - but discarded the impossible compliment and decided she was just being naïve and unorthodoxly kind. However, I then realised, I would make for a brilliant Wednesday Addams - of a darker shade of course, and with less interesting features. Besides that, I figure I have her personality in the bag - I'm generally sarcastically morbid and frank anyhow. Plus, with all the new black in my closet I can put together one of her simple grunge outfits - très chic. Maybe I'll even bring along a bottle of poison.

Now that I've made the extremely trying decision of what to be for Halloween, if I ever get invited anywhere, a huge burden has been lifted off of my shoulders and I can focus on something else equally stressful, like deciding which groomer to send my puppy to...


P.S. Dear Jamaica: care more about Halloween, so I'll have a surplus of events to choose from because I won't be attending any tweenage parties.

P.P.S. Thanks friend, for your participation in my life-changing realisation of how similar I am to Wednesday Addams.

Monday, October 15, 2012

An Ode to Lately

An Ode to Lately

Lately I've been feeling blue-grey
Blue as the oceans wide
Grey as the falling skies
Lately I've been feeling blue-grey
Blue-grey as Daphne Groeneveld's eyes

Oh school life,
'Tis the bane of existence
'Tis the birthplace of conformity
'Tis you who causes my lack of creativity

Oh social life,
'Tis you who has changed so greatly
So suddenly,
Now I sing,
"What did I do
To make you so cruel"
Oh social life,
I owe my woes and this ode to you

Oh mother,
Can't you realise
Can't you recognise, 
That fashion is the only key
To my gaiety

Dear mother, 
I'm in dire need 
of some retail therapy

(Please if you love my work and you'd like to publish my poem, Ode to Lately, you may contact me via email: pensivebrookeodetolately@gmail.com)